Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Let's Get Real

"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day?…"
"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child [or a sister or brother or spouse or friend] loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."
"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.
"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."
"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"
"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in your joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."
--Excerpt from The Velveteen Rabbit, written by Margery Williams
I’m becoming Real. With Kendall’s death, with my eating disorder LITERALLY almost taking my life, and then my soul, and then coming back from that. I am becoming Real by being a mother, and crying when Cade cries, and silently praying to God to heal his bladder and kidneys and emotional trauma he has suffered as a result. I am becoming Real because my husband and son love me, and I love them. I am becoming Real because life hurts. But would I really have it any other way? No freaking way.
...Because as the Skin Horse so wisely says, “When you are Real, you don’t mind being hurt.” Because you know that the hurt you experience will match, one day, the joy you will feel.

11 comments:

Dana said...

Brie
Thanks for being real. Thanks for posting things that others would be scared to post. Thanks for inspiring me to be better and try harder to enjoy and savor life. Thanks for being you. I hope you know I have always and will always admire you. THANKS!

Stacy said...

your words are wise.

You seem to have the most poignant messages to share lately. Your words are truly helping keep together my sad heart.

Thank you.

xo
Stacy

Telstaar said...

:) I really liked this post - I think I now plan on reading the Velveteen rabbit.

Loving you to health xoxox

CG said...

I love that book. Hang in there, Brie. xoxo

Heather Lindquist said...

Oh my gosh, Brie. Thanks so much for your words and insight. I needed to read what you wrote this morning, and I'm so thankful. You reminded me that even though there's so much pain, loss, and disappointments, THAT'S what makes us REAL....people who, through the pain, come out stronger and whole. A lesson I need to learn right now. Well said, my friend. And you're right....you ARE becoming Real. I think I'm going to get that book now.......

Penny said...

And i know that the last statement is so true, too. "The hurt you experience will match, one day, the joy you will feel." Maybe even exceed. The trick is the waiting, the patience with yourself and the enduring and getting back up and trying over and over. I love you my dear....

rachel ramsay said...

i'm gonna get real and get up to the northern land real soon. you are a rotating member of my top favorite people on or off the planet. love, racher

Laur said...

love that

THE CREATION OF A BEAUTIFUL LIFE said...

I love that story. Thank you so much for sharing it!

XOXO,

bananas said...

Love this post!

Katannah said...

Wow, this is eerie for me. When I was 18 and losing my mind, my therapist bought me this book. I have chills seeing the exact excerpt she read to me on your blog.