Sunday, January 20, 2008

Eating Disorder Virgin

Today I met with my bishop in the hopes he could help give me "spiritual guidance" while I am in continuing recovery from my eating disorder. He is helping to offer me support and insight in hopes that working on my spiritual self will help me feel less inclined to turn to anorexia to cope. Now, I really adore my bishop. He is a sweet man who truly has my best interest at heart and tries so hard to help me. The problem is, he has no idea at all what an eating disorder is. He's just one of those people that just plain 'ol don't get it, but that's totally okay. If I were so inclined, I could absolutely pull the wool over his simpleton eyes, but I'm enjoying de-virginizing him to the scary world of eating disorders. I let him borrow Steven Levenkron's Anatomy of Anorexia.(Which is fabulous, by the way.) I think that'll help educate him on the matter. In the meantime, some hilarious converstaions have ensued.

To illustrate, here are some snippets of our talk today:

Bishop: So, why can't you just weigh yourself again?
Me: Because when I weigh myself, I get obsessive about that number and want to make it lower.
Bishop: Is it a matter of money? Because I can buy you a scale.
Me: (What the...?!) No, it's not about money. But when I know what I weigh, I get obsessed with it and can't stop thinking about what I can do to lose weight and make that number lower.
Bishop: So it's not about money? ...I mean, I don't understand why you don't just see that number and want to gain lots more. Weird.


Bishop: So how much do you weigh?
Me: (Hesitatingly) I weigh approximately (x) pounds.
Bishop: Huh. So, is that underweight? I mean, you're skinny I how much do you need to gain?
(I tell him)
Bishop: And you can't just white-knuckle it and eat tons and tons to gain it? I mean, that'd be my dream come true! I'd love to have an excuse to eat! All the cookies you you like cheesecake? I bet you could gain it quickly from some cheesecake, eh?

So, wow. It was quite the interesting conversation. So he remains my soft ignorant baby virgin bishop where eating disorders are concerned. (I swear, if he ever tells me I look "healthy" and don't look like I need to gain weight, I'm so done. I mean, how many of us have had experiences like that?!)


alana said...

oh bish, bless his ignorant heart! being that you know he meant no harm, i hope you relished in the moment of knowing far more about something than your inspired, "called of god" bishop! i'm glad you gave him that book to read, it's by far the most accurate as far as understanding the mindset of anorexia (in my opinion). good luck with educating him! so...wanna hit cheesecake factory this week? ;)

sav said...

:) Oh gosh..."healthy" may quite possibly be more horrible than any other adjective that would describe me. I can't stand it so I can fully relate.

This man does make me giggle a little bit though :) He was going to buy you a scale, now that is it.

Tanya said...

LOL....Brie this just had me laughing my socks off. I am so glad that you can see he really just has no clue...I really hope he starts to see what eating disorders are really like at some point...

Laurie and Corey Kunz said...

that sounds like the most awkward conversation EVER.
I'll second your friend Alana, cheesecake factory sounds like a good idea if your bishop wants you to eat cheesecake. I'M IN :)

alana said...

Oh! party at CF in honor of your bishop! talk about good times! haha what do you think?!

brie said...

I think that's an amazing idea! What better way to commemorate my sesh with the bish than by eating some fabuloso cheesecake. I'm so in. Have your people call my people.

Emily said...

What a sweet man with such good intentions. Too bad he doesn't know shit about eating disorders. Oh well. They can't be all perfect. :) Enjoy educating him! I've yet to read that book. I really should order it.

Bowles Family said...

wow. i was cracking up. The poor guy. Some people really are just that clueless . . .asking you what you weigh?!? wow. anyway, gotta cut him a little slack. have fun "following orders" at the CF! ;)

KC Elaine said... bishop was a virgin too. he in fact inspired my first issue of EDucation. good for you for educating him!

Kate said...

I really admire you for not taking his ignorant comments personally. I mean, that's really awesome that you can allow yourself to see that he isn't trying to be rude or offensive.....he simply just doesn't get it and, therefore, doesn't know what is appropriate to say.
Way to go.
Luv you to pieces.

Kathy with a K said...

Hi Brie!
I'm new to your (wonderful) Blog.
Hopefully after reading Levenkron's book, the bishop will begin to "get it".
My faith has been helpful to me in my years of eating disordered life. Actually, I think it's knowing that when entrenched in an eating disorder there is no other religion...trying to keep priorities straight.
Looking forward to reading more from you!
(Cade is one adorable little boy!!)

mom said...

its early morning and all I can think about are my answers to your yearnings for you are asking the right questions. ED not only shrivels your physical body but stunts your emotional growth from the day you started to feed Him instead of your soul. You can't have it both ways. Now your desires are changing but there is still work to do; as you know and feel. Read 1 Cor. 13:11-12. For more than 6 long years you've kept yourself thinking as a child, seeing your potential darkly and your body distorted. Entrenched habits are hard to change but you can do it, don't be afraid. The other side is NOT as fearful and scary as the place you are now in.