Thursday, January 15, 2009

Write or Wrong?

Hello my pretties!

So I have been thinking about, like, this cool thing I could do, only I don’t know if it’s cool, and what if people think I’m lame ‘n stuff?

See, I like to think of myself as a writer. I may not be very good, and some may not like my super suave style, (alliteration: 3 points!) or think I’m very funny, or maybe I’m a total yawner to them, but I’m cool beans with that because I can’t please everybody. But ever since I was a kid, writing has always been my obsession.
And I don’t say that lightly.

Writing is and has always been a TOTAL PASH for me. I remember as a three or four year old, writing out poems and short stories. I won writing competitions as a kid.

(Yay for meaningless badges and medals!!)

I was reading college level books at 12, aspiring to be like the great writers I worshipped: Dostoevsky, Bronte, Austen, Steinbeck...

I’ve always secretly dreamed of writing the next Great American Novel, and while I know that’ll never happen, because The World does seem to hate me, and I could never be that great, but I think that maybe I could write something that people might like. Maybe relate to? Certainly most haven't suffered from an eating disorder, but everybody hurts, everybody struggles, and I'm not ashamed to share my story. I don't want people to be ashamed for their hurts, their mistakes, because we're all human, we're all flawed, AND.THAT'S.OKAY. It's taken me a long time to come this realization, and I want others to know this. That they're okay as they are. That you can change and be flawed but still laugh through it. That's what this is all about.

I actually turned in a manuscript into a publishing company, and I still haven’t heard back, but I know they’re interested, and I can’t believe I’m telling you this because if I fail then the whole world will know, but I think it’s pretty swell I tried, and you never know what will come of it…

But I was thinking…

What if I tried to publish my From Behind Bars series? I’d of course change the title, because even though sometimes it felt like it, I wasn’t actually in prison.
(I think.) (And yet?)
But I could go back to some of my past entries, jazz them up a bit, fill them out…and write more in detail about every aspect of every day I spent there – from a humorous, and I hope inspiring viewpoint.

What do you all think? Is it something you’d buy or be interested in? And by you I mean like the whole world? How do you think the public would respond? Or would you think I was a big box of lamesicles for even thinking this?

Please let me know. I honestly and for realsies want your opinion. Most of you are dedicated readers of mine, and I value your input. (Unless it’s negative, haha.) Because if even the Lovers of All Things Blogxygen wouldn’t be interested, then the general public sure as H bomb wouldn’t be.

What do you thinksies?

Oh, and my next entry (thanks Kara for the idea) is going to be on what my first day of treatment was like. I LOVED the idea and it’s going to be totally fab. Stay tuned!

LOVE YOU! (And if no one comments, I will hang my head in shame and find a black bag. I feel so insecure about this post.) (Gross.)

38 comments:

Laura said...

Brie-Your BEST post, for me, was the "Behind the bars" post. It is that little glimpse into a world that for some..have been there, and can relate...and for others, are simply curious. People LOVE an inside look...that is why reality tv is so popular.

There are plenty of "struggling stories" out there. There are thousands of self help books (hmmmm....me thinks I have read them all!) But the INSIDE look...the untold stories..THOSE are the ones I want to read.

Brilliant idea. Follow this one through. You are onto something. BIG.

And the title? I happen to like it. Sure, there may have been no actual bars...but Lord knows, that is where ED puts us. Behind bars...behind glass...cut off from the world. We may choose to be there...but ED locks the damn door.

Can't wait to see this book on the shelves!
xo

brie said...

shutup laura you actually just made me tear up a bit. you rock, and thanks for the comment.

you're awesome, kid.

Whitney said...

Like I told you last night, I think that your idea is a fabulous one! Have confidence in yourself and trust that there are a ton of people who would absolutely LOVE an inside look at treatment.

Love Always,

Whit

K said...

First of all, that's awesome that you already submitted a manuscript and it's even more awesome that you bit the bullet and told us about it despite your fears. Go you!

Second of all - YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY WRITE A BEHIND BARS BOOK!!!!!! I think your sense of humor will really make a book about treatment special. You are a fabulous writer. And you know how there are some writers that are fabulous, yet no one what's to read their books? Well, you are a fabulous writer and you keep the readers engaged the whole way through. I can't even express in words how cool I think the idea is to write a Behind Bars book. I think the general public will like it too, not just those with EDs because your writing style is so addictive. Yes, yes yes!!!!

And I totally think you should keep the Behind Bars title (unless of course you think of a title that is UBER UBER better).

I'm behind you 110%!

Heather Lindquist said...

I'm behind you 100% just as Kara said and I back up Laura as well. I'm impressed that you already sent somethikng to a publisher..that's such a HUGE step! I'm so proud of you, as I know that it takes time and a lot of energy to write a book, even about oneself! I've been trying for years! My only concern, and please don't take this the wrong way...promise?....is that people would get ideas or think that it's "fun" to be in treatment, etc. I think you know better than that, though!!! You're a smart coookie! I also think Behind Bars is an aweseom title.

And as for your next post on "your first day of treatment"....do you mean your REAL first day.....like when I saw you walk in the lounge area with those capri's on and you lookin' all fashionable and everything? I think you came in a day after me. I'd like to hear some stories from when I was there with you too, just so I can remember things as well.....not just your second or third time. I'd enjoy reading things that I was clued into as well, that makes it a bit more nostolgic, in a way. Is that bad? Oh well. Good luck and please go easy on yourself if the publishers think your a whack job, cuz you're NOT....My brother-in-law has written several books and he said the publishing world can often get pretty damg "bitchy" and stubborn. Stay true to yourself though...don't change anything that they want to make more "glorified" or whatever....do what your gut tells you. And even if they don't publish it, I don't think you should give up.....My bro-in-law has had many manuscripts turned down, so you have to keep chuggin' along, it's not you, it's just the snotty publishing world!! I love your witty humor and would love to read a book you wrote! And you better sign it for me!! : )

Oh....I just remembered about my first day at CFC. This was the time I was there before you, in 2000. Well, the minute I walked in I had about 16 girls walking up to me, gang-like-style and asking if I was LDS. I honestly thought they were asking if I was ON LSD! I was shocked. I didn't say a word. They backed up, and then one of them said, "no, the church of JC of LDS."....I said, what the hell is that? I truly had no clue. They didn't like me too much. At the time, before I actually became LDS I told them they were all going to hell. I even told my therapit that. Now that was quite amusing!

Adam and Cassie said...

I don't think you know me but my name's Cassie and we went to High School together. I stumbled on your blog through one of my friends (I don't remember who)but I love it. You are a great writer. I love the unexpected and humorous twist you put on living out crappy situations. I wish you all the luck in the world and I hope to see a book with your name on it in the not so distant future.

Emi at Project Swatch said...

I think people would love it - it's a great idea. go for it, absolutely.

KC said...

Totally publish it. Definitely change the title, though - it might be offensive to some? After all, treatment saved many of our lives. My concern is that your story is so humorous - would there be ANYTHING serious to let us know that treatment, like, actually helps? That it saved your life and changed the way you think about EDs? The silliness is great fun, and it works in short posts. I'm just concerned that if you string it all together it will be too much silliness and not enough about the truth of how some people desperately need treatment and how life-changing it can be. My only concern. Sorry to bring a big suckfest on your great idea. But that's what I think, for realsies. Other bloggers attack me now!

jen said...

You're behind bars post made me laugh and my abs hurt the following day....so many entertaining, funny things happen in treatment, I can think of so many stories! we can all relate in a way and it totally helps to bring some humour to the situation (or it would just be too depressing). So not only would I buy your book, but i'd most likely read it a few times (which is big for me....not much can keep my attention) keep writing!

Dana said...

Wow Brie! I have to say that I think that this is a GREAT idea! I know that my opinion probably does not matter that much but I just have to tell you what I think... I just recently found your blog and I have to say I cannot stop reading it! You are so open and real about everything you are going through and feeling. I love that! Then just when you start to make me cry you add in some sort of humor that makes me laugh. I am embarrassed to say I have spent quit a few hours just going through old posts of yours reading them. It is almost like a book to me. I think that you are amazing for what you have been through and how you are so open about how you felt about it. I really think that you could seriously help a ton of people with your words of wisdom about ED's and just coping with life in general. I think that people need more humor in their lives. More people need to learn to laugh (especially seriously hard times). I think life would just be a little bit easier if more people could do that. With our generation I think that the real mixed with the humor would be a great combo. Anyways that's just what I think. :)

Jen said...

I LOVE IT! I first stumbled on your blog through a FBB post and I have been hooked ever since:) And, I think the title is great--I don't think you have to write A Complete Perspective on EDs. There are plenty of books about treatment and how it helps, etc. Your writing is more like, almost satirical. Which is sweet. And I don't think there's anything wrong with it.

Standing in the Rain said...

Such a good idea Brie! Seriously. the behind bars were your first posts I read and I fell in love and haven't left since. (Creepy, but true!)

And I happen to like the title. I mean there is so much out there that is so damn serious all the time. Even in the midst of hard stuff, we need to laugh, even laught AT the horribleness sometimes. As someone who went to a treatment center but not CFC, I still entirely relate to your posts, so it's wouldn't just be entertaining for CFC people.

Keep writing briester. You rock my socks off!

Savannah said...

I think that it's a great idea! You are an amazingly talented writer and of course anything you write about would come out perfect, but I agree with everyone...this series would be awesome and put light on such a hard topic for some. Personally...I love the idea and would by the book instantly not only because I know you and your talent, but because it would seriously be interesting no matter where you come from in life.

I'm very proud of you that you sent a manuscript by the way :)

Love you! Way to go my fav. choc. dildo.

Sav

-Jen- said...

I've been secretly reading your blog for a couple of months and I had to come out on this one. You should ABSOLUTELY publish! I laughed hysterically at your last FBB post....it brought back all the crazy things from my IP days!

Anonymous said...

Hey Brie, not only should you write more stories, but you (as a fellow cat fatty lover) should totally look at these pictures of hugely obese cats. It brings me immense joy. http://www.tutztutz.com/2008/09/top-15-amazingly-fat-cats/

-Lindsay

kristin said...

I think people would love a book by you, Brie. You're an amazing writer. I so so so so hope that you become published!

Take care!

love, kristin

Unknown said...

Oh, i love the book idea. I think it would be fantastic. i would buy it for sure- maybe get an autograph?

ghost girl said...

Do it!!!! Good luck :)

brie said...

thanks all so MUCH my loves for the comments. i'm taking them all into consideration, and i appreciate all your feedback and ideas and support. you're all like my own special lil pack for cheerleaders!!!

Heather Lindquist said...

Hey girl...I know you meant well but something probably came up, but can we talk tmorrow? I'm out of work due to a concussion so will be home all day...SUCK! Take care, Heth

Jackie said...

You know how talented you are sweet girl - go for it. It will be a success I promise. xoxo

Jackie said...

And I have to agree with Kyla about the title but I am coming from a biased point of view with my wrongful conviction case :) But I will not take offense if you keep the title :)

Love your guts - take this step, people will embrace and love the book hun, they truly will.

Katherine said...

oh totally go for it!!! have faith in yourself--you're an amazing writer and i have always love love loved the behind the bars series. please compose a book of these stories! please keep us updated on the manuscript you turned in...so brave! the publishers would be A holes not to go for it. keep being yourself and you'll go far. love you!

rachel b. said...

I took a class with your (niece? cousin?) Marissa last year and started reading her blog, then found yours. You were actually right in the middle of writing From Behind Bars when I started reading, and I was hooked. It may sound corny to admit that a blog has done this much for me, but reading about your struggles and the way you dealt (and still deal) with them has made me feel so much more comfortable discussing my own past and demons with the people who really should know about them. Seeing you fall and get back up again--with humor and grace--is inspiring, and believe me, so many people are rooting for you that you probably have no idea are reading this. So I think you should go for it. Even if it doesn't become the Great American Novel, or as bestselling as Harry Potter, I would buy it, and I would love it.

Unknown said...

You are at an awesomeness level that I previously only reserved for people like Ms. Zoe and myself... I love your writing. You are extremely amusing, honest and courageous. Much love to you and your bebe. Go forward with the book - it'll do great. XO

p.s. I just started reading your blog yesterday and honestly sat down for a few hours and read it from the beginning. I had to stop myself from fearing that I was becoming a leach.

Unknown said...

You are at an awesomeness level that I previously only reserved for people like Ms. Zoe and myself... I love your writing. You are extremely amusing, honest and courageous. Much love to you and your bebe. Go forward with the book - it'll do great. XO

p.s. I just started reading your blog yesterday and honestly sat down for a few hours and read it from the beginning. I had to stop myself from fearing that I was becoming a leach.

Krista said...

I think you should totally go for it too! You have a way of writing that keeps people hooked. I love the behind bars series. It brings back such fond memories of treatment at CFC.

Sarah said...

I think it's a wonderful idea and would be great to read . . . and would give a new face to ED that would break some sterotypes.

Go for it woman. xoxo

Anonymous said...

OK, I can't even read through the comments right now but browsed them and they are very encouraging. So just to add to that, Yes! You are a writer. You should write!

eMiLy said...

YEAH BRIE!!! Fabulous idea my friend!

Flighty said...

I would buy a zillion of your manuscripts, Brie! I too love to write, and I know what that obsession is like...and besides, it beats the ed obsession. :) You rock, and I think this is a stellar idea. Not lame in the least. A lamesickle you are not, Brie, maybe a hotcicle though! ;) Seriously, I anticipate the release of your 1st published novel. xoxo

Tanya said...

I took so long to respond to this I am sorry it took me this long...but I am so happy to hear that you might be publishing something. I think its a great idea and the way you write gives some humor and sarcasm will help make it more understandable for people who have no clue about this. I am so excited...I would totally want to read it if you get published. Keep us updated.

Anonymous said...

Brie, I would TOTALLY buy your book. I'm just sayin'.

Marste

Paige said...

I've been wanting you to write a book since I first read your blog. You are a seriously amazing writer. I love the Behind Bars series :-) I agree with Heather that you need to include some stuff about your first stay there, because I'm for sure never going to write it down and I'd love someone to so I can remember!

Brooke said...

Hey Brie. I don't know if you remember but you let me read a few chapters with mom. If it is the same book as back then, i think it is amazing! I think people would eat it up. literally! ha ha

Penny said...

Brie,

This is your Dad sending a note on Mom's blog. I read your blog on writing a book and just want you to know that I have always thought it was and is just a matter of time. I saw your talent, beauty and goodness a long time ago. You have so much talent and ability and I know you have struggled a lot to find it and have confidence in yourself, but as your father, I have always believed in you and I always will!!

I love you a lot!
Dad

Brett said...

Hey sis,

As you can tell, I am very behind on everything. This is exciting! You've always been an amazing writer and reader. When we were ten I was still writing poems about the blue sky and green grass. You were reading The Grapes of Wrath. Hope you hear back soon, and if not, don't give up.

Brett

Jamie said...

when i actually have a moment to catch up on my blog reading, yours is one of the first I go to. I love reading your blog (and for the record...I am not a reader--in fact I despise it) but your writing keeps me reading and I find myself having to grudgingly force myself to stop and change poopy bums :) please write a book or two or hundreds because I will actually read them and enjoy!