Friday, April 24, 2009

Self-Appraisals, Self-Thoughts, Schedules – oh & Grody Words

Eck. I just had to fill out one of the self-appraisal forms at work; yep it’s that time of year again. I absolutely L O A T H E filling them out, and quite literally waited until the very last second to hand it in. What am I supposed to say?
I suck; don’t give me a raise?

Of course not!

I used lots of big and impressive phrases like ‘EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS’ and ‘FULFILLS RESPONSIBILITIES’ and ‘HAS A GREAT RACK.’ 0.19 cent raise, here we come!

I haven’t really done an update update in awhile. I don’t have a lot of words lately…probably because if I actually wrote them all out on my blog, they might would contain phrases like ‘I’M QUITE THE WINNER AT SWIMMING LAPS AROUND THE ANXIETY POOL’ and ‘BODY IMAGE BLUES + DEBILITATING ALLERGIES = NO BUENO-NESS’ oh and also maybe I don’t know ‘I HATE THE GIANT TUBE COMING OUT OF MY STOMACH, IT’S NOT TYPICALLY THE KIND OF FASHION STATEMENT I LIKE TO MAKE.’ Sometimes it’s just easier to not say all that, because when I admit how super lame and hard It all is, it makes it more real, you know?

My T gave me an assignment to make a schedule for the next few days, and to make it as structured as possible (as in don’t leave any time to think about the (sh)pit of despair my life has become).
Any ideas?
And no, I already asked, they cannot involve anything fun destructive like streaking, indecent exposure, and flashing. I guess I’ll just go to the craft store or something.
LAME LAME LAMAZOID.

And because I'm disturbingly random today, (seriously do I need help?) wanna hear my top 5 least favorite words? …And I’m not necessarily talking about their meaning that grosses me out, but the way they sound when they roll off the tongue. Nast, dude.

1. GENITAL. (This also includes GENITALIA.)
2. TRIGGER (Peew! Peew!)
3. OINTMENT
4. WEENIS. ‘Nuff said.
5. And my all time least favorite word? FERTILE. Which is why I’d never name my kid Myrtle (aside from the fact I’m not living in the 1940’s.) Besides, wasn’t she that chick that got hit by a car and killed in The Great Gatsby? (Ooh! Wait also wasn't she the whore? [Mistress, whatever?] or am I thinking of some smutty beach novel I read recently?) Someone enlighten!

Whatevs.

I hope you all have a weekend that EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS and FULFILLS RESPONSIBILITIES. But you will only be able to do this if you have a GREAT RACK. I dunno? That’s how I get the job done.

17 comments:

Heather Lindquist said...

I hate Weenis too.....blech. I also hate the word projectile. Not sure why.

Anyway, it's good to have a bit of an update! I know so much sucks now.

So, you have a schedule to make, huh? How about going shopping with one of your sisters? Or, asking Brandon if he could take Cade for the morning and you could sleep in on Saturday? Hmmmmm.....or how about flying to some exotic spa place where you can be pampered all weekend long? I'd go for that one. What do you have on your "list" so far?

And you only get a $0.19 raise? What the hell? Where do you work? Surely, that's illegal. But hey.......you could probably buy a button or something....you know, to make something out of it? : ) I have a busy weekend and just found out today why my stomach's been hurting so much lately and why I haven't had my monthly visitor for so long....I have endometriosis (I think that's how it's spelled). Anyway, I have to go into the hospital on Monday and they do a sonogram and then knock me out and do some sort of procedure to get the cysts off my ovaries. Ick. I hate that word too.....cyst. But tomorrow night I'm supposed to be at our school's auction, and my "boyfriend" is supposedly taking me out for brunch and then to go to a cool box store tomorrow before we go to the auction. So......I'm a thinkin' I may need to cancel some of that. But the vicodin is workin' REAL well at the moment, so who knows. Watch me become an addict now. I Looooooooovvvveee how sleepy, dizzy, and spacey it makes me feel. : )

Anyway, hope you get a good rest and some fun things done this weekend. Wanna sew me some wrist warmers? They've been cold lately. Actually, I think you'd need to knit those....do you know how to knit?

Shannon said...

I would like to add the words "Moist" and "Panties" to the gross word list. Especially if used in the same sentence. Oh, and "Hamper".

brie said...

H, I don't know technically that it's only 19 cents, I think I'm just being pessimistic, haha.

And Shannon - MOIST!! AAh I forgot moist!! You disgust me, lol!

Telstaar said...

Oh the strangest word I think is "Dinner" don't ask me why, but to me its incredibly strange sounding! I think I got that stuck in my head one day and no matter how much I tip my head to the side and knock on it, it doesn't come out! So "Dinner" is my strange word :D.

Oh I hate self evaluations, they really do suck. I don't mind it so much when I have supervision and they ask how things have been going and you kinda do a bit of self-evaluating together, but that is quite different to havign to fill out the wretched forms. Cause you can't be perfect, but you can't be an idiot either! I also reckon that most people who are conscientious will be too hard on themselves and those people that haven't a clue think they're brilliant. There are only a few in between that are intelligent and realise that you can't be too hard on yourself and not everyone is brilliant. Sheesh, I reckon it's a PhD in itself! Craziness.

Feeling your pain!!

(As for all the other stuff that you don't want to mention but did mention *hugs* I'm sorrowful for the fact that its hard at the moment and I do hope that it will get easier for you... I am glad that it is keeping you alive at the very least because you make a difference to me and many other people!)

Love Telly xo

zubeldia said...

Well, we didn't get a raise this year! AND I still had to do a bloody review which took an entire Sunday to do.

When I was thinking I was pregnant (I had only taken nine tests but hadn't had a blood test....) I asked my sport's doc to run a test and he said, when I noted how this was our first month of trying, 'you really are fertile Myrtle'! Oy.

Oh mercy, trigger is my all time most hideous word. In its place I use the word 'provoke', or something like that.

But to add to your list I hate the word 'flesh'.

Oh Brie Brie, I will happily read posts about body image, and sucky tubes, and all of that....
Love, Z

KC said...

good thing I've got an AWESOME rack!

K said...

Maybe you can put on your schedule to come study for the GRE for me...

Anonymous said...

Ew, self-assessment time. Laaaaaaaaame! If you were able to say those things about yourself, good job!

Penny said...

Don't you think that "grody" just sounds so grody?

Lisa and Jim said...

I hated "potty" and "tummy" growing up, mainly because whoever was using them was deliberately trying to make us feel like children.

Nowadays I hate "moist," too.

kristin said...

Good luck on your review.

I definitely agree with your choices in gross words. I definitely have to say I would also add panties and groin.

Take care, Brie.

love, kristin

Krista said...

I HATE the word discharge! Mostly because when I went to "the movie" in fifth grade the school nurse kept talking about yeast infections and how it causes a cottage cheese like discharge. I've never been able to handle eating cottage cheese since then.

Brooke said...

Weenis. Weenis. Weenis. Ointment. Ointment. Ointment. Genital. Genitalia. Genital. Trigger. Trigger. Trigger. Fertile. Fertile. Fertile. Fertile.

Feel any better?

Anonymous said...

I find myself TRIGGERed that you have a FERTILE WEENIS because of your new GENITAL OINTMENT (which is MOIST).


:)

Anonymous said...

Krista, do not screw up cottage cheese for me! Haha.

Starr said...

ewww I have always hated Panties. Even when I was teeny and my mama said panties, I was like Moooommmmm say underwear. sick, hate that word.

Katherine said...

tinkle, doodle, moist, ooze, puss...just to name a few icky icky words

love you b!