Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Practical v. Quacktical

Quacktical:

1. The urgency to gain weight isn’t as pressing anymore, because I’m not in the hospital, so that means I’m fine.
2. If I don’t take my meds, that means I can ignore the problem, and I’m sure I’ll be able to breathe just fine without them.
3. I don’t need to gain weight.
4. I’m fat.
5. Pretending like I don’t have a problem means I don’t, in fact, have a problem.

Practical:

1. I haven’t gained very much weight at all, and I need to in order to have healthy lungs and a functioning body.
2. If I don’t take my meds, I stop breathing. That actually like exponentially increases the whole lung problem thang.
3. I do need to gain weight. I can’t see that, but I need to trust my treatment team and my family, those that I trust, to tell me that I’m too thin.
4. I’m not fat. I’m getting, like, stronger. And the term “fat” is so…evasive. And there are so many different variables in determining if someone is “fat,” and, and really, who cares? NOBODY. I’m the only one who cares if I’m fat or not. But I’m not.
5. Pretending like I don’t have a problem makes the problem worse, because I’m not facing it and I’m not taking steps to get over it.

Sometimes I can be a real quack.
I just need a reality check sometimes. I think we all do.

12 comments:

Lisa said...

Yep. Pro-con lists are also effective.

Stay tough.

lisalisa said...

I really like the picture, of the little girl it the tutu (is that how you spell tutu?). That saying is so true for anyone suffering from an ED.

Standing in the Rain said...

True true. I like your list Brie. Don't you just hate those lies your head tells you? Good for you for realizing they are just that...quackical!

You rock! (As always!)

Mickey said...

Nicely put Brie!

Kara said...

Great post! Keep trusting those around you!

kristin said...

I definitely like this post. I think I need to make this kind of list, too!

Take care, Brie! I hope you are well.

as always, love, kristin

HAFC said...

I love your new word...quacktical.....sounds perfect....can I steal it? Anyway, I too need reality checks at times and actually got a good one last week when I went to see the doctor. My head injury has really messed up my immune system (well, actually the meds that decrease the swelling do) and thus I'm sick ALL THE TIME with something or other....normally I have the flu and am puking like a crazy girl. Thus, I have to be more observant and diligent with keeping me healthy.....weight wise. After I got that "talk" from the doc, I drove home and bought a costco size box of power/energy bars. No kidding. They give me heart burn though. I don't like that, so I carry tums around with me all day. I tell the kids in my class (who think I'm eating candy) that I'm really just eating colored chalk. They kind of look at me funny, then, not knowing what to quite say, smile, giggle a bit, and then slowly back away. It's hilarious. I do eventually tell them the truth...I'm not THAT mean! Watch we go to work tomorrow and all the kids will be chewing and sucking on our chalk. I'd probably pass out from laughter. But, they're silly with that kind of stuff, so I can totally see them pulling a joke like that on me! Kids are so awesome. They make me laugh at myself, even when I'm feeling sad. One of my kindergarteners was sitting next to me today on a bench on our deck and she started rubbing my back with her hand, up and down, up and down, as if she was comforting me or something. I wanted to laugh, but held it in. Kids just show affection in the funniest of ways! Another one blows me kisses whenever he sees me. Okay, I've totally gotten off topic. Sorry. So yes, I like your new word. And yes, reality checks are SO needed, especially for me who lives in the clouds sometimes. : )

Keely said...

Very well said. :)

Misty said...

I know this has nothing to do with this post, but is the word, "wedgina" pronounced with a hard i?

Penny said...

You said so much in that post. I love love how you are so getting it. And your father would be so proud that you made a "pro-and-con list". And your cool new word, is, so disarmingly incredible.( as you are).

Telstaar said...

I like the reality check. It can be hard to keep a reality check i reckon lots of the time. Speaking it out is always good to reinforce it :)

Thanks for helping me to reinforce my own head and brain :D

Love Telly xox

Brooke said...

Yes Brie, Mom is right. Dad would be proud to see how organized this post was! Very practical :)

I'd like to show it to a girl where I work...hmmmm...I think it would be helpful.