Monday, March 31, 2008

Therapy Was Good Today

Me: It’s so hard for me to gain weight when I just don’t see it. Everyone all around me is telling me I’m too thin, but I don’t see that at all when I look in the mirror. It’s so hard to take that leap of faith and trust others to gain weight when I cannot see that I’m underweight on my own.

T: If you could see you were too thin, would you want to gain weight? Would you finally give yourself permission? I’m not sure you would.

Me: You’re right. I don’t even know anymore.

T: It’s time to just do it. Do it Brie! Stop waiting around for other people to say it’s okay to take charge of your life and get healthy. Because you know what? Every single damn person on the face of this earth could line up and tell you that you were too thin, but it wouldn’t be enough. You’ll never believe it. So stop waiting when it’s never going to happen. Just DO IT. Take the initiative. Recovery is far less cowardly than relapse, far braver, and much more admirable. And I believe you can do it.

12 comments:

Emily said...

Know what? I believe you can do it too. You rock, Brie!

heather said...

Yes indeed. You Can do it. I've always believed in you. Take that giant leap for man/ED-kind! You're amazingly brilliant and can do anything you set your mind to. It'll happen, and you'll succeed. And you'll feel more proud of yourself for succeeding at recovery than you ever did at starving yourself, that's for damn sure!

Stacy said...

that was a motivating speech if I ever heard one.. JUST DO IT!!!

(and not to make fun but doesn't she owe royalties to Nike now?)

It is scary. WAY scary but you are great and you can do it!

aLana said...

amen to michelle. it was in fact a fabulous little soliloquy, but my question is what your intended action is after hearing such an inspiring speech? i sure hope it involves hitting CF because i haven't been for a long time and think it is never more perfect than when in combination with a bit of brie time! :) let me know your thoughts!

The Cheese said...

Lana, I'm totally re-committing myself to weight gain. My dietician said today that if I don't start gaining in two weeks, I'll have to get the tube or be hospitalized. So, chili cheese fries and tighter pants, here I come!

jana said...

Are you having health problems and/or losing weight currently? Just wondering why hospitalization/tube feeding is being threatened. Scary!

Brandon said...

Yes. I was getting treated for asthma last weekend and couldn't even get a shot in my hip without it hitting a nerve because I was too thin.

The Cheese said...

Sorry, to avoid confusion, I didn't know my husband was signed in when I replied to you, Jana. It was me, Brie. :)

alriggells said...

Amen to the therapist. I know you can do it. You are amazing, so strong, and have it in you. You can do it if only you want to. I love you, and am here for you if you are willing to let me be.

aLana said...

briezy,
you can totally do it! let me know if you want to go out to eat and i'd be happy to encourage and support you through the freak out session! just let me know! lotsa loves!

ps...check your email. i don't want to post it on here.

jana said...

Hip needle -- youch!

Manda said...

I believe you can do it as well. You can do it and you will. I am positive of that.