Friday, September 25, 2009

Please Pass the Placenta

So I was bored, and perusing a birth board of other mommies in the US who are due in April ’10 like me. I read a thread a woman posted; and she was asking if any other women were planning on eating their placenta too, after giving birth.

My Diet 7-Up I’d just taken a mouthful sprayed out my nose. And that stung.

I’ve seen my numerous kitty lovers throughout the years partake of their placenta after birthing their litter of kittens. It’s supposed to be full of nutrients, and I guess on an instinctual level, help get rid of the smell of birth matter so that predators don’t come to dine.

But I have never, ever, EVER heard of humans eating the placenta. And I consider myself a knowledgeable Woman of the World.

Let me illustrate for those of you who have never given birth or know what a placenta looks like what you’d be getting yourself into: when I gave birth to Cade, my placenta was about 8 lbs. And it was big. And like purple and veiny and bloody. Really, it looked like a deflated punching bag. My doc hefted it up for me to see, and I was like GEEZ PUT THAT AWAY. I mean it was gross.

And every woman for herself, okay? I’m not here to judge any of you placenta-eaters. I just couldn’t, well, stomach it. The woman went on to say that she packed it in salt (like beef jerky) and then froze it and then she would cook it like regular meat (it tastes like liver!) and season it as she would a steak, and if her husband was grilling chicken or steak on the grill or something, he’d just throw on a slab of the good ‘ol placenta for her to eat. She sprinkled it on top of her fettuccine; she put it in her soup, and worst of all, every morning she blended some up in a fruit smoothie. And, to date, she still has two uneaten placentas in her freezer that she’s still getting to.

And when her daughter was born? Oh they had a party to celebrate that, and what were the hors devours? Just some crackers and cheese and placenta. (Did they tell their guests?) (OMG)

So I’d like to officially state for the record that I am not planning on partaking of my placenta after birthing my little Polly Pocket. But if anyone’s having a craving – cuz these are kinda hard to come by! – let me know, and you can have mine.

Yum.

28 comments:

Jamie said...

Oh yuck. I can't believe that! I've only ever heard of someone eating placenta once - and that was on Baby Mama...a film. Not real life! Haha. Wow.

inthemainstream said...

I feel like I've heard that before, but like Little House on the Prairie old school, not like today. Fascinating.

bananas said...

EWW. Why oh why?!

Lady Clare said...

Oh yes, I have heard of this. I can't imagine though- gross! I know some people make "placenta prints" which is painting the placenta and the pressing it on some paper (though some just use the blood that was already on it-- ewww!). It usually looks like a tree, lol.

Heather Lindquist said...

Oh my. I was reading this while standing in line to check out of the grocery store! I couldn't help myself; I burst out laughing while simultaneously wretching. That is soooooooo unimaginable. And gross. Thanks for making my shopping experience gagfully knowledgable. : }

lisalisa said...

Wow. So glad I was eating beef jerky as I read this.

lisalisa said...

Wow. So glad I was eating beef jerky as I read this.

Stacy said...

what about the amniotic sac? I hear those are scrumptious too.

but really this made me throw up in my mouth a little bit. groan.

Shannon said...

Yup. I was eating maccaroni and cheese when I read this and saw that beautiful picture. Needless to say, I lost my appetite.

I have heard of women who actually make their placenta's into a tablets that they take every day. Its still weird, but at least youre note chewing it up and swallowing it. *Shudder*

Cher & Ad said...

Um. This is quite positively the most morbidly strange custom I have ever heard. i'm going to go toss my cookies now.

Eating Alone said...

There was an artical in Time about it not too long ago. They have someone that can make it into tablets. It's supposed to be very good for both the monther and the baby, if your breastfeeding.

That said, I'm not sure I could get past it if the mother of my child started self canabalizing. Thank god I'm a guy and don't have to worry about such things.

zubeldia said...

it's meant to help with the hormonal shifts and thus it wards off postpartum depression. Not my cuppa tea but on one board I frequent quite a few women freeze dried theirs. Can you imagine having placenta shake/stirfry/etc

licketysplit said...

No. WAY. Sick sick sick.

Kara said...

OMG - I have never heard of eating placentas!!!!!!!!

Telstaar said...

Oh my gosh... I actually had to stop reading AND minimise the browser TWICE to read this post... EWWWWW not cool at all, or hot or anything, ewwwwwwww...... Ulgh... its things like this that are seriously gonna turn me into a vegetarian one day!

ew ew ew

Cammy said...

Actually tons of animals do this, there are tons of nutrients, etc, in there. What's interesting is that even strict herbivores, such as cows, will do it, possibly the only time in their lives they ever consume animal tissue.

Technically, it came from your own body, so it wouldn't harm you as long as it was preserved properly, and there are good stuffs in there...but on this one, I think I would have to put the science aside and concur with you, ew.

THE CREATION OF A BEAUTIFUL LIFE said...

I'm pretty sure that made my tummy churn. I may also have just vommitted in my own mouth- in which I will now wash down with my diet mountain dew.

Jackie said...

*GAG* OMG never having kids!!!! That picture made me sick!!!

Brooke said...

I would for sure pass on my placenta. My ob called it "ratty and small." Hence, my children being so un-healthy in my womb. Yuck.

tawny said...

Um, hi! could you please post again b/c everytime I am on my google reader, I see the scariest, grossest, blobbiest, red meat thing staring at me and I seriously wanna lose my lunch every time!! Please???? :) thanks.

..and that story is so disgusting.
seriously who in their right mind??xo

"Julia" said...

My mother is part Indian, so she buried it and planted a tree over it.
Probably what I'll do with my kids if I can still have them.

Krista said...

Oh NASTY!!! I also vomited in my mouth a little bit.

kristin said...

For some odd reason, I actually knew this. Don't remember when I found it out, but it is still just as disgusting thinking about it now as it did when I first found out. Just ewwwww!

Starr said...

K I think that eating it like that sounds nasty! But my friend that's a midwife prepares it and puts it in gelcap pills. Then you just take a pill. It really is supposed to give you back all of the nutrients/hormones stuff that you lose to the baby. The pill form doesn't sound so bad, but saving it in the freezer and adding it to random dishes. SICK

Keely said...

Ew!!!! Oh my god! I can't believe that. I'm okay looking at it but imagining "throwing some on the grill"??????? EWWWWWWW!!! And the fact that she's savoring it by freezing it....

ghost girl said...

Oh, i heard about planting a tree with the placenta! I think that is a good idea. I planted a tree with my grandmother when i was a little girl. Every few years we took a picture by it. She is 89 now and we pretty much traded heights!!

Yes, pill form sounds slightly sane, but the eating the raw deal is el-sicko! lol

Misty said...

I can't believe you told us this when dad was in the room. Poor dad. Seriously. I actually would consider eating mine if it could help me get rid of my biff.

Emily Violet said...

http://www.inhabitots.com/2009/10/01/doing-it-for-the-kids-design-exhibition-placenta-teddy-bear/