This post will of course not contain any numbers whatsoever, but I am going to talk about my weight. So if this easily triggers you or you don't care or whatever, then pllleeeaaaase skip this post. I don't want any angry nay-sayers in the comments; I just need to vent.
I just saw my dietician. She told me that I cannot lose any more pregnancy weight. Now, granted, I am soooooooo close to having lost it all, so really I suppose I'll live, but I very much wanted to lose that last little bit to get to where I was before I had Mila. All of my pre-pregnancy jeans fit, though there are a couple pair that are a little tighter than I want them to be. But the D told me that they're worried my weight loss is too eating disordered, so until I can start to let go of some of the ED behaviors, I can't lose weight because my treatment team is not convinced I am doing it in a completely healthy and appropriate way.
I know they only have my best interest in mind. And I'm going to trust them. But it's SO HARD. I barely said anything during my appointment today because I was angry and a little bummed about all this. I get confused because EVERY WOMAN, whether or not she has an ED, wants to lose their baby weight. So why can't I? I guess the line between losing weight in a healthy way, and losing weight in an ED way, is just a little blurred right now. But I wish it was clearer, because I am confused.
She also took away exercise, but really, running a wimpy one mile at a time kinda sucked anyway. But my goal was to work up to more exercise, not less. Duh. Sucks I can't keep my exercise privileges for more than two weeks. :(
I just feel really discouraged.
Words of wisdom would be appreciated, or even just some support. I could totally use my own personal cheerleader right now.