Thursday, May 7, 2009

When Having a Handicap is good

Well, I am in a bowling league. Yes, you heard me right, no need to make me repeat myself. Okay I will I’m in a freaking bowling league can you believe it?! When Brandon’s dad called and asked if we wanted to join, in dead seriousness I was like, Don’t you need to be good to play on a bowling league? Or at the verra least have a shiny, full beard one can be boastful of? I mean, there are some hard-corsies out there. One time Brandon even saw an old dude with oxygen strapped to his back bowl like a 200.

And then there’s me.
I have my own ball and shoes, so that makes me a leeettle legit, but when one does not know how to use them correctly, it actually makes you look like a sad eager beaver, and I’m not going for that either. Though I’ll take that over having oxygen strapped to my back, but still. So Big B told me not to worry about it, that they’d give me a handicap to make it even and we’d have fun.

So last night it started. No competition yet, just played three games to find out what our handicaps will be next time we play. My scores were 105, 167, and 103. My goals were to not look like a reject but also to at least bowl over 100 every game, so I partially achieved them. There are four of us on the team: me, Husband, his dad Steve, and one of Steve’s co-workers that apparently really likes big billowy Hawaiian shirts. He was really good though, so I’m totally welcoming him on my team. C'mere big guy, let's hug!

So all in all, I truly didn’t do as bad as I thought I would. I’ll still have quite a high handicap, but I am okay with this because it is the only time in my life that I’ll ever want to, like, have a handicap. And I for shizzle did better than some drunken girl in a tube top on the other team that was doing more hoisting her shirt over her boobies than bowling. Who would put a tube top on to go bowl? Well, if you’re drunk enough, I guess anything makes sense…but anyway she totally sucked; bowled like a 67 and I felt bad BUT mostly glad that I at least beat somebody. Although a 67 is pretty good if you’re drunk, right? Maybe she was just cheating to get a high handicap. Note to self: look into this.

Our team name is like the weirdest in the world. I think it’s JACN: which stands for, and I think but am not sure: Just Another Crappy Name. And no that is not a joke. I don’t think any of us think very highly of ourselves? Meh if it had been up to me, I had have gone for something awesome, and combine two words in one, like the Strikerrifics, or if that doesn't work, how about Pork Soda? I pretty much decided right now that that is the most amazing team name eva! I suppose I am a quiet creative resource on the team that they have not yet tapped into. JACN my arse. Pish.

So, despite my monster migraine, this horrible anger I’ve had licking at my insides for days now, regardless of everything, I had fun. And I was surprised. :)

My handicap, by the way, is 69. That’s pretty high. But that’s alright. Being handicapped is fun.

It raises my self-esteem a notch or two to know that I bowl better than drunkards, you know? At least the one in tube-tops, anyway.


Telstaar said...

Oooh this is so cool! Okay so maybe I'm a bit of a dork but pft, who cares! Smiling and laughing and fun are invovled so I think it's very very cool. Looking forward to hearing yr scores every maybe I can start a pot regarding when your handicap will be down to zero??!!!

YAY for fun!


licketysplit said...

HA! I have never bowled over a 100, and even created a reputation for myself of throwing the ball... backwards! Yep! That's right! Look out when you're bowling with Shelly! Glad you were able to have some fun :)

Laura said...

I am happy to see you used the word beaver in this post. Not to mention that it was eager.

Also happy that you got OUT. Sometimes we need to push ourselves to do "happy things"...good job!

Just dont hurt the beaver.

Kyla said...

sounds like fun!~ but I have to admit, pork soda made my stomach turn a little.

Zena said...

So glad you got out and had some fun..your scores were amamzing, My H and I are considering joining a leaugue so Ill be interested to find out how much FUN it is!..i am forcing myslef to go to the circus tonight...should be a good time but I would rather stay home and sulk..and yeah pork soda kinda made me a little quesy.

Love, Z

love, Z

Kara said...

Are these MEK jeans? I totally think I have the same pair... I love them.

Brooke said...

Nice, nice. I would be intimidated to be in a league. It sounds so "official." Go for the gold! Or, at least try to keep your score higher than the tramp in the tube top!

Kerri said...

Do you have team shirts? That would make it very official! ;)

My son is 4 and he can bowl 140. Okay, so what if that was on a WII- he kicked every other adults butt that played with him!

I am glad you had fun!

Paige said...

I love that you are on a bowling league. This is my favorite thing ever! I'm so impressed that you have your own ball and shoes. PS, one day when both of our lives aren't so crazy and busy, we should get together.

HAFC said...

I SUCK at's quite laughable for me, but I admire your courage in going out there in an actual league! : )

kristin said...

Sounds like fun. I am glad you had fun. You are lucky that you got a handicap! I need to check into that next time I bowl. I seriously really bad. ..especially when I'm drunk. ;)

Take care!

love, kristin

jana bananas said...

Brie has great jeans and introduced me to MEKs.

I have no idea what a bowling handicap is, I admit. I would totally join a bowling league though -- seems fun!