Wednesday, September 17, 2008

updownupdownupdown

Up and down it seems my life has gone. Sometimes the ups and downs occur so quickly that I have no time to pause for breath, to put a space between the upandthedown. Updownupdownup and then down again.

I realize this entirely may mean that I have a bit of a mood disorder; perhaps a dash of mania and a teaspoon of depression and POOF! we have da bi-polar disorder. Or, perhaps a mild case, anyway.

But I hate labels. So we’ll stay away from them. I don’t want to be Brie the Anorectic, Brie the Bi-Polaree, or Brie the Model, or Brie the MILF (ha!) or Brie the Creepy Catophile, but, rather, just Brie. I mean, I know I may be a little lame, but, you know, ‘lame’ is another label, so we’ll stay away from Lame Brie, too.

So Brie with all her updownupdownupdownupdowns and then up agains will have to suffice. And one day, I hope that I can have an UP and then, maybe a s l o w d o w n, and then an UP again, but perhaps the downs will be fewer and farther in between and they won’t occur so quickly thatIcan’tputaspacebetweenthem.

UPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWNUP
UPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWN
UPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWNUP
UPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWN
UPDOWNUPDOWNUP
UPDOWNUPDOWN
UPDOWNUP
UPDOWN
and then
finally
UP

12 comments:

Emily said...

I hope you have more UPs. You deserve to feel good!

Brett said...

"Sometimes we're on the upsides of the downs and the downsides of the ups." I hear this commercial on the radio EVERY day at work. I don't think it really makes sense, do you? If you're on the upside of the down, doesn't it just mean you're up? And if you are on the downside of the up, doesn't that mean you're down? Anyway, I hate it. I repeat the quote all the time. In fact, I've said it a bunch of times today, before I even read your blog.

Oh. . . and I hope you stay up for awhile! You will if you come to St George this weekend!!!

brie said...

Bretty you're comment made me laugh and laugh! I read it to Big B and he loved it too. And yeah, I agree, that quote is pretty jacked. I don't get it. ...We are actually still thinking about it...it all depends on this house we may rent out...long story...we'll talk instead of having me write it out, it'd take too long. But I heart thee, my twin bro.

brie said...

I meant we're actually still thinking about coming to St George this weekend. I think the way I phrased my comment made it seem like we're STILL thinking about the quote!

Heather Lindquist said...

My class of k-first graders are EXACTLY like YOU! No joke. Updownupdownupdown, etc...all day and it's entirely way too exhausting. I mostly am on the "down" side, but to go up and down so quickly...that HAS to be tiring,isn't it? Do meds help?

Jackie said...

You don't have to label yourself as anything my dear. EVERYONE goes up and down (at least everyone WE know!) It is okay, it is normal, at least to me. I feel the same way - it is like a light switch. Just take care of yourself (aka BOOST yourself up) if you know what I mean. I think if you are nutritionally stable, it might help the ups and downs become a little less severe. I love you always, even during your down times.

xoxo jax

Laura said...

wait...you mean to tell me that there is an UP side???? woo hoo! Can't wait! Cause this down stuff sucks.

Courtney said...

All I can say is I totally hear ya. It's exhausting, to say the least. I'm just impressed you can be real in the ups and the downs, I've always had the tendency to only let people "see" my ups. Especially being pregnant, I feel like I can't be real about my struggles or else people would think I'm the worst mom-to-be ever. So even though I'm sorry it sucks, thanks for reminding me I'm not alone in the suckiness!

Brooke said...

Yo Brie. If anyone understands it's me. I've been doing it for four and 1/2 years un-diagnosed. FInally, I really am starting to feel like myself again. Hang in there and follow Oriville Redenbachers advice. He really saved my life....literally!

Sorry for what you are going through.It is real, and it sucks. Things will get better once you get the right cocktail of meds.

kathy with a k said...

I'm thinking you might enjoy a ride on a see-saw, or a merry-go-round, or a really cool pogo-stick.

Laur said...

its all good babe, im here for you up and down and sideways.

Tanya said...

Hey Brie,

I too hope you have more ups than downs. Hugs. And labels are dumb. Really dumb.