Feeding Tube & Other Stuff

Okay, well, to update on the feeding tube (it's been awhile, hasn't it?): my D is allowing me to only put it in 3x a week now, on Mon, Wed, and Sat when I go to my yoga class so that I can especially make up for any burned calories. I’ve made a lot of progress as far as weight gain goes, then have lost a bit, so I’m working to perhaps gain it back on my own without having to rely on the tube entirely. A huge fear of mine (and my treatment team’s) is that I’ll get so reliant on the tube; I won’t eat much solid food. I definitely don’t want to do that, so I’m happy for the chance to use it only 3x a week and see if I can manage.

I absolutely adore my yoga class. It’s YOGAMAZING, if you will. I love the mind/body connection, and how it’s about strength and endurance and not cardio and calorie burning and weight loss. Last night when the hour was up, I was so disappointed. I could have gone on forever.

Here are a couple of pictures of the kitten. He’s pictured with my mental kitten, Hairy. Bobbi wouldn’t pose with them, she’s still miffed about the small mammal using her littler space and eating her food and sniffing around her butt et al.

The Cadester is doing great. He’ll be two next month, I can’t even believe it. Since I lost my camera, (I can’t even talk about it, I’m so upset) I can’t post a plethora of adorable pics, but I’ll post this one – I stole it from my friend Laurie’s blog. That’s her little boy, Conner, who is hella cute. As you can see Cade’s big and blonde babymazing. He talks like crazy now, and strings three and four and five words together already. He’s great at communicating what he wants and needs. When I pick him up from the babysitter, he’ll inform me the whole way home that he was scared. “I scared,” he says, over and over. ...

Unfortunately, as you can tell, he seems to have a tender little sensitive personality like his mama. When I nap, he’ll say, “Mama tired. Night-night mama,” and kiss me goodnight. He’s my perfect sweet angel baby, and he’s so fun to have around. His current obsession is his shoes. He always has to be wearing either his Crocs or sandals. And he’ll tell me which he wants to wear, and it switches all the time – sometimes it gets old because he wants it changed all. the. time. This morning, the first thing he said to me as I pulled him out of the crib to get him ready, was “Cwocs, mama. Cwocs.” I put on his sannals (sandals) and he was mad, but I couldn’t find the other cwoc. He definitely is a small man who knows what he wants – and he lets everyone know. He subsists mainly on mac ‘n cheese and waffles and gummy bears. I can barely get him to eat much more, which is a bummer, but the kid loves to go through weird food phases, as do all toddlers, so I’m hoping his propensity for narrowing his food choices are a sign of him “just being a toddler,” rather than “having a mom who has an eating disorder and therefore passes on weirdness to him.” Yikes.

What else? Not much, I guess. Loving the summer heat, and when I’m not loving it, I’m cursing the ozone and the faulty atmosphere and global warming for making it so damn hot. This is usually when I’m in my un-air conditioned car, sweat trickling down my back and neck and me not being able to hear myself think because the windows are rolled down on the freeway, and it’s pretty deafening. Seriously. I can’t even think about it, it just makes me all tight and angry inside.

Okay, well, sorry this post was neither funny nor interesting. I just don’t seem to have much to post about lately.