Monday, August 24, 2009

Honest Scrap

I’ve been nominated/tagged/chosen/whatever for the Honest Scrap Award by this kick-A blog, but have been too grumpy/infantile/busy with moving/pukey to get to it. But here I am! I accept! I’d like to thank all the Little People.

Here’s watcha do:

"This award is bestowed on a fellow blogger whose blog content or design is, in the giver's opinion, brilliant. This award is about bloggers who post from their heart, who often put their heart on display as they write. There are three rules that need to be followed on accepting this award:
1) Brag about it.
2) Select three blogs you find brilliant and link to them.
3) List 10 honest things about yourself.

Okay, step one, brag. I can do that. My blog is awesome and you’re kind of lame if you don’t like it, even though I’ve hardly blogged this past month and all I do is complain about my sore ta-tas and getting hit by the pukey truck. (I mainly had to add this to make sure I didn’t write an entire post without mentioning my pregnancy woes because then I wouldn’t know what to do with myself.)

Tag three brilliant b to the logs. Okay.

1. Tawny my sister’s. Her pics are amazing and her layout is fun and she’s supercute and supersweet and superfun.
My lil Piece of Cake. You know you want some!
My friends over at the Mormon Bachelor Pad. Sometimes they can be douche bags but they’re pretty cool. J

10 things about myself. Okay. I will try not to mention any pregnancy-related symptoms. It’ll be tough but I’ll take a wack at it!

1. As a kid I used to eat band aid wrappers. Not the outside wrapper, but the shiny, slippery parts that are on the adhesive parts of the band-aid. They were GOOOOOOD.
2. I once got hit in the head with a totally legit wooden bat at a birthday party as a kid. Apparently some other loser thought I was the piñata. At that same house, I also got attacked by a swarm of red ants. Yeah my mom didn’t want me to go over there anymore.
3. I passed out when I was getting my wedding photos taken. My dress was a corset and I had my mom yoink it as tight as she could so I looked skinny and bust-y and ooh la la. Halfway through the shoot I passed out and only woke after my mom loosened the corset and shoved almonds in my mouth. On my wedding day, it wasn’t pulled as tight which sucks but at least I didn’t faint all over my father-in-law or something.
4. My mom had a particular friend when I was growing up that scared the crap outta me because her laugh was uber loud. Whenever she’d come over I’d hide in the closet till she left. I have clear memories of my mom looking for me and I just hid and hid till she left. She’s actually really nice though. But seriously she totally had a cackle of fury. I was just a wee sensitive thing. But sad don’t you feel bad for me?
5. I swear like a sailor when I play Nintendo. When I die I take it personally and apologize profusely to Mario.
6. I have kissed guys who have the names of the gospels in the Old Testament. You know, Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John? I am inanely proud of this.
7. I pick my cat’s eye boogies because if I don’t, who will? Santa Claus?
8. I was the Secretary of my 7th grade class. My responsibilities included doing NOTHING but having my pic taken for the yearbook.
9. I used to think crimping my hair was cool. That was back when the 80’s had its grip on me. In the year 2001.
10. I have the following movies memorized, almost line for line: My Best Friend’s Wedding, Tommy Boy, Billy Madison, Juno, and Dumb & Dumber. As you can see I like really intellectual movies.

Thanks for the nomination! I forgot earlier to thank God and the Academy.


Lisa said...

I used to crimp just a couple of sections of my hair - one on each side. Why, I have no idea, but thankfully no photographic evidence survives.

tawny said...

Ahh you are hilarious!! Seriously your writing makes me laugh every morning. I needed that today..considering my last few crazy days around here.

Your blog is the best and I think so many peeps relate to are honest and lovable all at the same time.

loved your 10 honesty's..what the heck with the cat burgers?? simply gross. and you can't tell we live in happy valley when you have dated all the men in the Bible..!!

Hope you are keeping down the food today, NO MORE blueberry poptarts for you..PLEASE. I can't hear your pukey story anymore...but LOVES to ya!

inthemainstream said...

So, pretty much, we can't play Nintendo ever. That brings out a competitive side of me that's just unparalleled.

Telstaar said...

Hehe this post amused me muchly :)

Go crimping!! I have pictures of me looking like and absolute fuzzball with the hair crimped within an inch of its life and some crazy party dress - oh my! :S


Mormon Bachelor Pad said...

The word you're looking for is "jerk".

I think the title of "douche bag" should be reserved for a different type of dick face.

bananas said...

I kinda just fell in love with Mormon Bachelor Pad just with that comment.

I like your style. I like it a lot.

Laura said...

oh crap, B, I am so BAD at being tagged...I NEVER follow up...but I will try, try, try....

me love you and Tawny too....

feel good...and if you can, I have two cats here who have some eyes you can tend to...

Penny said...

I 'm not sure what to say about your "honestys". I knew about some of them..... but the bible guys are news to me!. I think that crimping is the worst thing any one can do to their hair! I read your blog because of its candor and humor and your integrity. Thanks for making my day (most days). And I too, love Tawny's blog for "uber" obvious reasons!