Tuesday, May 25, 2010

I Like my Brie Plain, Please

I’m…back? Have you been crying LARGE TEARS OF SUPERFLUOUS SAD in my absence?

Maybe?

It’s funny. (Well, not really, but, you know, it’s a term.) I’ve had a hundred million people ask me why I’ve given up blogging. And it’s always prefaced with… “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, or if it’s too personal, but…”

…But but BUT guess what peepcicles? It’s not too personal! I promise there’s no big or special reason I quit blogging, there’s no drama about why I took the hiatus. I’m mildly interested in the fact I seem to be important enough that there are some pretty wild rumors going around on why I stopped. But truth of the matter is…

I've changed.
And Blogxygen wasn’t.
So in order to keep Blogxygen alive and well and breathing, it needs to change with me.

Like I said to my brother in an email today, and I verily quoeth, “…and yeah, my blog wasn't just about my ED, but my struggle and recovery from it was definitely a piece of that, and I think I'll try to omit some of that and focus not so much on who I was, but who I want to become. So when Blogxygen is re-born it'll be a little different...but hopefully better!” (Why do I always feel like an eager beaver when I exclamate?) (Seriously. This is a legit question.)

So there it is. My ED was my life, you guys, seriously, for a decade. Since 199freaking9. I restricted, I starved, I went into the hospital countless times and IP treatment almost as much. I ranted, I raved, I almost died. I wrote about it I dreamt about it I lived and breathedandimmersedmyselfinit. I was a living, walking eating disorder – that was solely my identity – or – I was a 180 degree difference – I was a livingwalkingbreathingRECOVEREDANOREXIC. And I don’t want to be that either. I don’t want to be Brie the Anorexic, but I also don’t want to be Brie the Recovered Anorexic. I like my name plain; just Brie, please. Labels can lick my right butt cheek.

It’s time for me, on my bloggy, to not focus so much on who I was…but who I want to be. Whatever the H bomb that may be. But I’m pretty jazzed to figure that out, for realsies.

I’m excited to share that with you, if you’ll let me. Whaddya say?

36 comments:

Eating Alone said...

So now your Brie the what?

Brie the Mother?
Brie the Wife?
Brie the Comedian?

Sad to say but I didn't start reading you till shortly before you brief absence so I don't know much more about you. You did make me laugh, and a few times I cried with you.

Don't care who you are, just glad your back.

Devon said...

Hooray - I loves it.

Jenny Bay said...

Welcome back! :)

brie said...

david, i think i'm all of those things, plus lots more - that's what i'm figuring out. :)

thanks for the welcome, guys. wuv you.

Cammy said...

Ooooh this made my day!!! I'm really looking forward to hearing about how things go as you move forward with taking your life back and giving some air to that awesome healthy Brie that has been partly masked by the ED for so long. You rock, my friend!

t. said...

yay! you are back. how i've pined for your witty blog entries. ;) seriously though, i do love your writing and am glad you are back.

and i'm looking forward to reading all about the unlabeled brie.

Adam and Cassie said...

I've missed your post so much. Yours is by far one of my favorite blogs to read and I'm excited you're back. Your old ED wasn't what made you interesting, your personality and outlooks on life make you interesting. So no worries, you won't be Brie the Recovered Anorexic.

Girl. said...

yay :) i'm excited for you Brie, and excited to have you back :)

TM said...

YAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!!

mallorymallorah said...

Welcome back to Blogland! And I have to agree with Adam and Cassie, "...it's your personality and outlooks on life that make you interesting." I look forward to reading more from you :)

mallorymallorah said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
kristin said...

I am excited that you are back Brie! I've missed you! :)

Megs said...

Oh my gosh yay Brie I'm so excited your back...I started reading your blog a year or so ago and don't comment much but I think the world of you! And just love to read whatever it is that you have to write. Welcome back! :)

Lindsay said...

Yay! I'm excited you're back!

Shawnee said...

You're back!! YESSSS!

inthemainstream said...

Welcome back!

Alexandra Rising said...

I'm so happy. I dont care what the hell [excuse my language] you write about as long as you write: cause you're splendid at it.

And, selfishly, I missed you. And tried the text and the fb and the email and then was like, 'Stop bothering soul sistah, Alex!'

Conclusion: Happy, am I :)

Und: Welkommen.

Laura said...

no deal

just kidding
of course

Tylaine said...

So glad you're back Brie. I've missed reading your posts!!
Glad to hear that you're doing well. :)

Sarah said...

Whoohoo!! I agree with a few of the commenters-I originally found your blog because of the eating disorder aspect, but there are PLENTY of blogs about eating disorders that I don't read. Your blog was never really about the eating disorder to me--it was always about your hilarious, honest, strong, and real take on life as a mom, daughter, wife, friend, and employee at unspecified insurance company. I will continue to read no matter WHAT you post because you are a fascinating person. And (borderline creepy alert) after reading your blog for like two years I feel personally invested in you and your life and I want so badly for you to succeed and love yourself the way the rest of us do. I'm so happy you're back. Write about whatever. I'll keep reading!

alriggells said...

Yay!!! You are awesome. I love you girly. Keep on keepin on. :)

brie said...

holy crap! i've missed all this looooove lol. you guys rock.

Liv said...

So happy your back, Ive missed your written and visual blogging style, and the truth of your blog. Write about whatever your life is evolving into, i know ill read.

Spaghetti Friendship Flea Market Piano said...

hey i know this is a weird name to post under, but it's Sara (no H!) thank friended you on FB via your sadness departure of blogging. and i wholeheartedly approve of your return, because you like Always Sunny and most of your posts make me feel like i'm a normal person (even though i don't capitalize my "i")

Krista said...

Now I have something to look forward to reading when I take my little brats- I mean students- to the computer lab! I missed reading your blog mucho!

Amber Larsen said...

I can't not comment on this post... I've always wondered when you would reach this point? I worried your blog would keep you from moving on because you were so deeply identified with and by your blogging as an anorexic or a recovering anorexic and I thought to myself, "what a hard thing to give up when that's what you write about?"... I'm so, so glad that you recognized that trap and you are rising above!!!

bananas said...

There are so many aspects to who Brie is, and they all deserve to be explored! Writing has always been your outlet, so welcome back to writing! Don't write to entertain, just write for you. And in the process, I'm sure we'll all be happy reading. :)

allegri said...

I am stoked! welcome back mrs brie!

elisa024 said...

Glad you are back to blogging! <3

Jamie said...

We love YOU, Brie!!

Dana said...

I am so excited for this change. I cannot wait to see what will come of it. I predict much laughter and amazingness. Thats what I see. Thanks for the inspiring change. Love ya tons Brie!

Sara said...

Hey lady! I'm so glad you're back and writing. I found you through ED blog rolls like many others, but I've definitely stayed for YOU, because you are a wonderfully entertaining writer! You don't need to be anything other than Brie, for sure :) Looking forward to hearing more about...well, whatever comes your way.

Kerri said...

haha I totally got my wish. I just responded to your last post the other day because I missed your posts and here you are! yay!! I honestly don't care what direction you take it in- I don't read to hear just about your recovery, you are an interesting and funny person on your own. In fact, like someone mentioned above, I worried that maybe having a blog that had basically been all about your ED was holding you back. I figured that was why you took the break in the first place. Either way, I am really excited you are back and can't wait to see the changes. :)

belinda said...

whaddya say?

LOVES IT!

really, i do! :)

Stephanie said...

While, I do have the blessing of being da D-Twin, I have been able to see "plain Brie" the whole time... but I too am very glad to be able to read your hilarity on a regular basis. Welcome Back B!

Katannah said...

Ooooh. After a crappy week, this is awesome news indeed. I must get to catching up. Glad to see you back, lovely lady.