Everything from STD's to Shopping

Suffering from Writer’s Block is, like, worse than having an STD. Not that I would know. I swear! I promise thee. 
I struggle to write on my blog. Haven’t made progress on my book in a few weeks.
I’m barely even reading. You know it’s bad when I’m not even reading.
I wish someone could make me all better…

I’ll just give you a quick update:

I’m okay. I’m casually looking for a second job, and Husband is still on the lookout for a new job. In the meantime we’ve filed for unemployment and the bitches make you pay taxes. On unemployment. I mean, how does it work to be taxed on money that you’re given because you’re destitute? Yes, Utah, please take my money and re-pave a road or plant a few trees while we have bread and water for dinner. I mean it’s not that bad but you get what I mean. Lame lame lamazoid.

Doing well with my mealplan. We’re tweaking it because we’re trying to figure out exactly how much I need to eat to maintain my weight. Even though I feel like my calories are quite high, I’ve lost a little, but we’re assuming it’s because Girlfriend’s a tall glass of water and I need lotsa, as my D would say, energy. (She acts like the C word – calories – is a bad word, or if I hear it or something, I’ll freak out and be like trigger trigger trigger peew peew peew! Energy, according to E, is interchangeable with the words ‘calories’ and ‘weight.’ E, the dietish: Wow. We need to up your energy, or Wow, you lost energy this week so let’s add even more energy!!) She’s Finnish. Maybe it’s a Finnish thing? Note to self: look into this.

I haven’t mentioned in a loooong time my C Man. I just love Cade. He holds my heart. Bran took this pic last night. We were sleeeeeepy.

Yesterday I went with the BFF’s Whit and Steph (I’d link to their blogs but they, like, for some odd reason value privacy and anonymity and have set their respective blogs to private. Whatever. Pish.) to the mall to try on new pants for the new booty. Whit felt pukey so didn’t have as much fun, but Miss S and I tried on, like seriously, 1203894788 pair of jeans in the Almighty Amazing Store, Buckle.. We were in the same dressing room grunting and squeezing into every size from, like I said on Facebook, 24 to 32, (okay really we weren’t trying on that broad a range of sizes, but cllloooooose) and laughing the entire time. Why not, right? Here’s our designer denim-fied pa-tooties this afternoon in our new Miss Me’s we boughts. Tres delicious, yes? Teff is going for the Winged Bottom look, while I went for the more rustic, cowgirl skinny pair. For some reason in the dressing room, we morphed into talking with British slash Scottish accents and said BAH! and BROWN BEAR! like every other word, and the sweet salesgirl, Elaina was her name, was trying desperately to keep up with our need for new jeans and witty repertoire. She bravely did her best. We’re considering the possibility of opening up a much coveted spot in our shopping expeditions and having her go with us; we must honor this girl’s courage for putting up with our dirty jokes, messy dressing room, and plus I mean she was just DARLING. She assumed we were sisters, which made her golden in our book; that, and she flattered our flat asses. ;)

LOVE YOU all. Have a great day, friends.